This is more personal than anything I’ve ever been apart of. More personal than every abortion I’ve had to pay for, and boy, those really bust my balls. But this is how it’s going to be for the next two weeks: Pats vs. Giants. The classic Men vs. Women race, where we clearly know who the winner is. You got into the Super Bowl by a 31-yard FG? Yeah buddy go nuts, that’s real admirable. It’s nice to know that I’m not the only sane one here, Cracker actually knows about what teams to support. Can’t stand Giants fans. Every single one of them is like talking to Jerry Seinfeld after a lobotomy. Painful, but not nearly as horrific as Eli getting curb-stomped in Indy will be. Everyone knows that he’s the bitch of the Manning brothers. Just couldn’t deal with getting the short end of Daddy’s stick, so he went football himself and took a bid with the G-Men. Textbook vagina. But everyone knows that Brady is going to spank that little bitch just like he did Tebow. Soon enough, Brady will be sitting on the couch getting sucked of by Gisele in a pair of Uggs. Classic.