[NBC] A sheriff’s deputy in Ohio has been fired for ordering jail inmates to dance to an Usher song in exchange for making phone calls and using a microwave. Dominic Martucci, 35, was fired from his post at the Summit County sheriff’s office this week, and the departmental charges against him — including ones of misconduct and of mistreating inmates — were released Wednesday. He’s accused of making five inmates entertain him with a dance to Usher’s “Yeah!” in order to regain privileges — like the chance to make phone calls, use a microwave and get items from the commissary — that they had lost earlier in the day. One inmate did the worm, and another busted out the robot. “I did what I had to do so I could use the phone,” the inmate who responded to the command with robot moves told investigators. He had to call his family because a relative had died. Martucci allegedly called over another deputy and said, “Stop and watch this, it’s going to be funny.” The inmates told investigators that their dance routine audience included as many as five deputies. One inmate said that he was sent to lockdown because he had “messed up” and that Martucci demanded he dance to his liking. Martucci admitted that his actions were wrong but insisted he was just trying to “lighten the tension” in the jail by forcing the inmates to dance.
Is this for real? There’s sheriffs out there known for dressing inmates in pink undies & feeding them green bologna running a Mug Shot of the Day competition online yet deputy Dominic gets the boot? Bullshit. You know what lightens the tension in 1000% of situations? Breaking out the motherfucking worm or robot. It doesn’t even matter if the person does it well. As a matter of fact, it’s funnier if they suck. I distinctly remember a buddy of mine’s worm attempt at like 3:30am on a dirty bar floor. Why was he doing it? Because I told him if he did the worm from one side of the bar to the other, I’d cover his share of the tab. Dude immediately dropped in position and proceeded to hammer his dick & balls on the floor repeatedly as part of the worst worm in history. He powered through the pain and earned his free night of drinking while we all laughed for about 2 hours straight. Sure, 3:30am at the bar doesn’t equate to a few years in the clink but it’s the best worm/robot story I got. My point is, it’s always fun, even for the person doing it. Name one time where someone had a miserable time being Mr. Roboto? You can’t. I don’t care if it’s at a funeral, your doctor’s office when you find out you have cancer, or in prison trying to use the microwave. It’s a god damn good time. So shut up and dance, you pussies. Beats the shit out of prison brutality or butt rape.