Would This Guy Rather His Last Name Was Hitler?

Posted: June 28 @ 2:00pm by 610 in Bolivian

Meet Team USA slow-pitch softball assistant coach Randy Raper, seen recently on ESPN2.  That’s right. Raper.  Yeah, sure, the true word for “one who rapes” is Roethlisberger “rapist” and not “raper” but I don’t think semantics are gonna help anyone sporting that surname on the back of their jersey.  A United States of America jersey no less.  Not a good look, America.  Anyway, is their such a thing as surnameism?  Like racism or sexism except with last names.  Has to be when you’re handed a resume from Randy Raper, right?  How can you take him seriously?  This is Waldbaum’s pal, not some perverted WWF.  Or what if you’re some big-titted bimbo at the bar who digs the slow-pitch long ball, falls head over heals for Randy & then finds out if you decide to spend the rest of your life with him you’ll be known as Rita Raper?  Your perfect 10 would probably rather bail on her knight in shining armor than be Mrs. Raper and give birth to a bunch of Raper babies.  It might almost be an easier life to be an actual rapist than have the last name “Raper”.


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