Well It’s About Time Dildos Became The Threatening Weapon Of Choice

Posted: May 17 @ 1:30pm by 610 in Bolivian

big_boy_black_dildo_3[Sydney]  A man tried to extort money from a Sydney mechanic he blamed for losing his Mercedes-Benz by threatening him with a large black sex toy. Aaron Sabbah was armed during an attempt to demand money from Michael Monajed, Sydney’s Central Local Court was told during a bail application on Friday. “What is the alleged arm?” Magistrate Eve Wynhausen asked. “It’s a black dildo, your honour,” prosecutor Christian Hearn said. Mr Sabbah arrived at Mr Monajed’s workshop on April 22. “Sabbah … entered the workshop in an intimidating manner with a large black dildo in his right hand, which he was smacking into his left hand continually in an aggressive and threatening manner,” the documents state. The 39-year-old’s $167,000 Mercedes-Benz had been repossessed in January after he defaulted on a loan. A week later Mr Sabbah allegedly drove the repossessed vehicle away from the car yard where it was being held and took it to Mr Monajed’s Botany workshop to have the brakes replaced. The next day police spotted Mr Monajed driving the stolen car. They took back the car and released the mechanic without charge. In the meantime, Mr Sabbah, who was overseas, allegedly rang the mechanic and demanded $10,000 that he estimated was the outstanding loan amount, which turned out to be $112,000. “You are responsible for losing my car,” court documents allege Sabbah said. Over the next few weeks Sabbah upped his demand to $30,000 and made threats of violence. After allegedly being threatened with the dildo on April 22, Mr Monajed fled the premises and contacted police.

Makes you wonder what took so long for fake dongs to become a weapon of choice. If you want to have your threats taken seriously without the risk of a “deadly weapon” charge, why not a monster dildo? The last thing I want to see is a dude who’s angry at me twirling a huge rubber dick like Donatello. I’m cool with the isolated risk of getting shot/stabbed/beat up. But I can’t imagine a more terrifying few moments than having to consider the possibility of getting thumped in the temple, then in the starfish. Sure, a sadistic motherfucker could do the same with a baseball bat, but that thought doesn’t cross my mind unless a guy like Aaron Sabbah steps to me with a veiny, triumphant bastard in-hand. I’d rather fight off a real cock than a Lex Steele clone. At least I have nuts to punch or hopes of a premature ejaculator. Dildos don’t stop. Dildos mean business.

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