Posts Tagged ‘bank’

[WISH]  Police arrested a man they say robbed a bank with a glue gun on Monday. Around 1:40 p.m. Monday, an armed robbery was reported at PNC Bank, 3003 Kentucky Ave. Bank employees said the man displayed what they thought was a gun and told them he had a bomb, while showing them something taped to his leg. The man got away, but officers from Indianapolis Metropolitan Police Department and the FBI Safe Streets Task Force identified him through surveillance video. Officers tracked down their suspect, Aaron Randolph, in the 3300 block of South Lockburn Street. They found all the money, along with the suspected “firearm” that was used — a glue gun. They also determined Randolph wasn’t armed with a bomb, as bank workers said he threatened.

Oh he wasn’t armed with a bomb?  No fucking kidding.  I wish I wasn’t so skillfully creative and, instead of blogging from my mom’s basement, I had to get a remedial job as a bank teller.  I’d be like the Cal Ripkin of consecutive Employee Of The Month plaques at PNC just thwarting heists left & right.  Take my man Aaron here, for example.   (more…)


[Citizens Voice]  A Butler Township man claiming to a have a bomb demanded money from a bank teller in Sugarloaf Township on Monday, only to return it minutes later after a scolding from his girlfriend, police said. Otto C. McNab Jr., 36, of 73 E. Foothills Drive, Drums, was arraigned by Magisterial District Judge Ronald Swank in Mountain Top on Monday evening, hours after demanding money from a bank teller at Susquehanna Bank and telling the employee he had a bomb and was willing to detonate it. “Times are tough,” McNab told reporters as he was escorted by police into Swank’s office Monday night. “You gotta do what you have to do to support your family.” McNab entered the bank around 12:15 p.m. Monday and told the teller, “I have a bomb. Give me the money or I’m going to set it off.” He left the bank with $2,262 and returned to his vehicle, where his girlfriend sat waiting. Unaware McNab had planned to rob the bank, his girlfriend yelled at him. He returned the money and left the parking lot. Using a description of the vehicle, police located McNab in the area of state Route 309 in Butler Township. Police took McNab into custody after stopping him as he pulled into his driveway. McNab is charged with robbery, theft by unlawful taking, receiving stolen property and terroristic threats. McNab’s girlfriend will not face charges, police said.

No-brainer here, Otto.  You did the right thing.  Times are tough fo’ sho’, but just because you sacrificed your freedom & potentially your life to make ends meet for your loved ones doesn’t mean the end result of a couple G’s is worth a woman’s scorn.  Wait a minute…that’s probably what you got the scolding for. If so, then it’s well deserved.  Who the fuck robs a bank for $2k?   (more…)

[HuffPo] An elderly woman robbed a Colorado bank by passing a note saying she would infect a teller with AIDS if the clerk didn’t hand over money, police said on Friday.

Jeff Satur, spokesman for the Longmont, Colorado police department, said detectives are searching for a pale woman between the ages of 55 and 75 with a “boney build.”

Satur said a woman, who was wearing a train conductor’s cap and a gray sweat shirt, walked into a Wells Fargo bank inside a Safeway grocery store on Thursday night and handed a note to a teller.

“She indicated she had AIDS and would give it to a teller if she didn’t cooperate,” Satur said.

The woman coughed frequently into a blue bandana during the robbery, and fled with an undisclosed amount of cash, Satur said.

Police and the FBI released still photographs of the robbery and are reviewing additional photographs and surveillance video from the bank’s parking lot to try and identify the suspect.

I’m calling bullshit on this whole scheme. No way this wrinkly hag has the AIDS. First of all, elderly people can’t have AIDS. You get AIDS from having sex and old people don’t have sex. People who get AIDS are young and die before they ever reach elderly status. Also, she doesn’t look gay or black which are two more strikes against her having AIDS. (more…)

[Columbus Dispatch]  A security camera at an East Side bank yesterday got clear photos of a robber who revealed his face when he was told to obey the bank’s “no hats, no hoods” policy, the FBI said. The incident began at about 4 p.m. when a man in a dark, hooded jacket entered the PNC Bank at 2385 S. Hamilton Rd., said FBI Special Agent Harry W. Trombitas. As the man waited in line with his hood up, concealing most of his face, a bank employee told him to take it down. The man did, Trombitas said. Eventually, he said, the man handed a teller a note saying he had a gun, was robbing the bank and would shoot her if she didn’t give him money. She did, and the robber fled. The suspect is described as a white male apparently in his mid-20s, 5 feet 5 inches tall, of medium build, clean-shaven, with short brown hair, a dark shirt, a dark coat, dark pants and dark shoes.  “Law enforcement credits PNC Bank employees with enforcing the ‘no hats, no hoods’ policy, which caused the man to take down his hood, revealing his face to surveillance cameras,” Trombitas said.

Laugh at this guy all you want.  “What an idiot, why would you take your hood off if you’re gonna rob the joint!?”  Why?   (more…)