Posts Tagged ‘crash’

[AutoBlog]  The Thrill Of Victory. The Agony of Defeat. Rarely does one person get to experience such highs and lows within mere hours of each other, but when it happens, the comedown is often all the more painful. Just ask Santaquin, Utah resident David Dopp. The Frito-Lay truck driver won a green Lamborghini Murciélago LP640 Roadster, grand prize in the “Joe Schmo To Lambo” contest operated by Maverik gas stations and last month. Dopp, father of six, was finally presented the car on Saturday afternoon, after which he set about driving it around the neighborhood, giving rides to friends. His elation wouldn’t last. Less than six hours after taking delivery of the Lamborghini, Dopp lost control of the 640-horsepower Italian, hopped a curb and spun it into an embankment 75 feet from the road. A witness, Miles Davis (yes, really), said that skid marks were evident on the road and that the car ended up facing the wrong direction. Neither Dopp nor his friend in the passenger seat were injured. Police say the accident was likely “speed-related,” although Dopp reportedly says he was only doing 40-50 mph when he lost control of the car on a section of road with a 35-mph speed limit. Dopp maintains he might have hit some black ice or gravel. While the extent of the damage to the Lamborghini is not immediately clear, local publication InSantaquin News notes that Dopp has full insurance.

In other news, the sun is hot.  Water is wet.  Women & monkeys are interchangeable.  No shit some Joe Schmo truck driver who won a Lambo crashed that shit.  I’m surprised it took him hours and downright flabbergasted David Dopp is still alive.  What a pussy.   (more…)

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Well no shit she’s gonna be pissed, Ameleah.  I don’t think she’ll be too concerned about the car though. I mean a 5 year-old taking the initiative to hop in the Chevy & find her missing mom is actually something a parent should be proud of.  Sure, her daughter offset those smarts a bit by sitting home alone in the dark for a few hours instead of flipping a fucking light switch – but, having a 6 year-old roommate myself, I know all too well their flashes of brilliance are balanced by utter retardation quite often.  So…what’s Ameleah’s mom got to be pissed about?   (more…)

MALONE, N.Y. — A New York man who had abused his ex-girlfriend and then plotted to kill her and make it look like she had been mauled by a bear was sentenced to prison for trying to hire someone to kill her in a staged car crash. Clyde Gardner gave up on his first idea: Kill a bear, skin it and wear the pelt while using its claws to kill the woman as she took out her garbage. The plan included him wearing the bear’s paws on his feet so no human footprints would be left behind. Prosecutors said the 57-year-old junkyard owner had carefully watched his ex-girlfriend’s movements, hiding in the woods with binoculars to learn her routines after she kicked him out of the house they shared in Malone, near the Canadian border. When he abandoned the first plan, Gardner approached a friend and gave him a picture of the woman, her license plate number and $500 toward a $15,000 bounty to kill her in a car crash. Gardner, an experienced demolition derby driver, advised the man how to make it look like an accident. He also told him that if the crash didn’t kill the woman, he should take a piece of broken glass and slit her throat, Franklin County Assistant District Attorney Elizabeth Crawford said. The acquaintance went to police, who sent him back wearing a hidden recorder to get Gardner on tape talking about the grisly plan.

If I know anything about killing a loved one, it’s that you never, ever, under any circumstances let anyone else in on the plan. Unless you’re friends with a professional hitman, chances are your buddy’s gonna rat you out. Believe it or not, not every acquaintance you make is as down with murder as you are. But you’re pretty much headed for failure to begin with if (more…)

[AZCentral] The sky is not falling. A 12,500-pound NASA satellite the size of a school bus is, however. It’s the Upper Atmosphere Research Satellite, or UARS, and it’s currently tumbling in orbit and succumbing to Earth’s gravity. It will crash to the surface Friday. Or maybe Thursday. Or Saturday. Out-of-control crashing satellites don’t lend themselves to exact estimates even for the precision-minded folks at NASA. The uncertainty about the “when” makes the “where” all the trickier, because a small change in the timing of the re-entry translates into thousands of miles of difference in the crash site. As of the moment, NASA says the 35-foot-long satellite will crash somewhere between 57 degrees north latitude and 57 degrees south latitude. In this hemisphere, that includes everyone living between northern Newfoundland and the frigid ocean beyond the last point of land in South America. It’s the biggest piece of NASA space junk to fall to Earth in more than 30 years. It should create a light show. The satellite will partially burn up during re-entry and, by NASA’s calculation, break into about 100 pieces, creating fireballs that should be visible even in daytime. An estimated 26 of those pieces will survive the re-entry burn and will spray themselves in a linear debris field 500 miles long. The largest chunk should weigh about 300 pounds. As the Friday-ish crash gets closer, NASA will refine its estimate of timing and location, but the fudge factor will remain high. “There are too many variations on solar activity which affect the atmosphere, the drag on the vehicle,” said Nicholas Johnson, chief scientist for orbital debris at NASA. THE END

Um, is anyone else freaking out about this or is it just me? I mean, I don’t want to be Chicken Little here but where’s the rest of this story? Where’s the part where they say we can blast this plummeting bus with a scud missle? Or how it’ll just break up into dust particles before it has a chance to hit the ground? Or even what day it’s going to slam into the Earth? Or how the government is hiring a group of misfit oil drillers to fly up to space and plant a nuclear bomb in it while Aerosmith sings them a power ballad? Nope, none of that. It’s just, (more…)

[Oklahoma]  Around 6:30 p.m. on Saturday, August 20, a deputy with the K-9 unit was traveling westbound on S.W. 29th Street near S. Pennsylvania. In the video, you can see the white pickup truck in front of the cruiser swerve out of the way. Moments later, an SUV appears and slams into the cruiser. The deputy suffered minor injuries. His K-9 deputy “Boze” was not seriously injured. The Oklahoma Highway Patrol arrested the driver of the SUV, 21-year-old Francisco Noriega-Perales. Perales was jailed in the Oklahoma County Detention Center on complaints of driving under the influence, driving on the wrong side of the road, and not wearing a seatbelt.


All’s Well That Ends Well, I Guess

Posted: July 25 @ 3:00pm by scrody in Bolivian
Tags: , , ,

All the videos circulating around the web ended right after Gay Gary the Rocket Man plunged deep into the ocean. But this video shows the end of the story. Like a flaming Phoenix rising from its wet ashes, Gary is triumphant in the end. And everyone lived happily ever after. Look at the smile on that fruity bastard’s face.

[Sentinel] A Middlesex Township woman faces DUI charges after police said she was riding her motorized wheelchair in a mobile home park while intoxicated this morning. Middlesex Township police said they received a report that a woman was crawling around a yard in the Country Manor mobile home park at 4:23 a.m. When police arrived, they found Connie Lebo, 63, sitting in her motorized wheelchair and drunk, according to police. Lebo told police she had been driving the wheelchair around the mobile home park when she crashed and started to bleed, police said. Lebo told police she then tried to cut through a yard and flipped the wheelchair over, according to police. Lebo was taken to the Carlisle Regional Medical Center and submitted to a blood test, police said. She was charged with driving under the influence with a blood alcohol content of .16 percent or higher, according to police.

If I’ve said it once, I’ve probably said it at least twice, women do not belong behind the wheel. Or on top of wheels as the case may be. Pretty much being attached or near any sort of wheeled, motorized apparatus of any kind is a bad idea. But it really takes a special kind of cretin to be able to pull this stunt off. (more…)