Posts Tagged ‘dead’

Is Joe Paterno Dead Yet, Or What? UPDATE: Yup. . . Dead.

Posted: January 22 @ 10:45am by scrody in Bolivian
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A bunch of sites are reporting that he lost the good fight, but CBS Sports updated it’s article, saying the family refutes the reports. I can’t imagine he has much of a desire to hang on. It would probably take a long time to build your reputation back up after playing enabler to your buddy’s kiddie diddling habit. And at 85, time is not really something you have in abundance. Might as well just turn in and call it a life.

UPDATE: He croaked. He’s now in the great locker room in the sky, where he can cover up for Jesus raping baby cherubs. God speed.

[AP] North Korean television announced in a “special broadcast” that its leader, Kim Jong Il, is dead. News of Kim’s death was made public on Monday, with officials indicating that he actually died two days earlier while riding a train. Reuters notes that the country had begun transferring power to his son, Kim Jong-un, who is believed to be in his late 20s.

Is there no end to Kim Jung Il’s narcissism? All the coolest iron fist rulers have been dropping like flies over the course of 2011. Bin Laden, Gadaffi, Castro. You didn’t expect Jong Il to let himself be left out, did you? That’s why he staged his own death just so he could feel like he was invited to the party. (more…)

Is Kevin Costner Dead?

Posted: December 14 @ 4:10pm by 610 in Bolivian
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I’m hearing from the Jason Ellis Show on XM/Sirius that Kevin Costner died.  Am I being punked?

[WWLTV]  A practical joke led to a fight and turned deadly Friday evening and left one man dead, according to Slidell Police spokesman Assistant Chief Kevin Foltz. Around 8:15 p.m., authorities were called to a home in the 2000 block of Seventh Street. When police arrived on the scene, according to police, a male victim who had been stabbed was sitting in a chair unresponsive. Police set up a perimeter and located the suspect a short time later. Felipe Fuentes, 40, of Slidell, was arrested and charged with second-degree murder, according to police. Authorities believe that a practical joke ended in a deadly altercation. According to a police report from Foltz, “the victim and suspect were inside the apartment drinking when the suspect went to the bathroom.  While inside the bathroom the victim held the door closed as a joke.” Once Pueutes got out of the bathroom, the two engaged in a fight, according to police. The fight was stopped by other people. However, “A short time later the suspect armed himself with a large pocket knife (4 inch blade) and returned to the suspect’s apartment. Once inside the apartment he walked up to the victim without saying anything and stabbed him in the chest,” said Foltz. “The victim in return hit the suspect over the head with a beer bottle, causing a large laceration to the top of his head.  The victim then staggered to a chair and died.” Pueutes, who captured by a K-9 later, fled into a wooded area, according to police. He is currently being held in the St. Tammany Parish Jail.

I get it.  I’d have stabbed that motherfucker too.  Most normal people would’ve just called the prankster an asshole, but not me or Felipe.  We’re bullies.  We can pick on anyone we want all day.  There is no limit to our public humiliation skills, and there isn’t shit you can do about it.  Sorry but only a select few can be O’Doyles.  But once the tides are turned, we overreact big time.   (more…)

Nice try, buddy.  You would’ve had me too if it weren’t for the ‘correction’ tweet.  Like, ‘wait, I need another week to finish recording my post-mortem record’.  Don’t piss on my head and call it formaldehyde…

– thanks Doug

Al Davis Is Dead

Posted: October 8 @ 10:44am by 610 in Bolivian
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The Raiders website says there will be an official statement later today.  Dude took a lot of flack lately, but he was a fixture of the franchise that, overall, is certainly considered successful.  Sure, recent pictures look like he’s been dead for 10 years but his real time has come.  RIP

[Washington Post]  Westboro Baptist Church announced plans Wednesday night to protest Steve Jobs’s funeral, sending the message out. . .wait for it. . . via Twitter for iPhone. Margie Phelps, daughter of the small church’s founder and the lawyer who represented the church during their First Amendment case at the Supreme Court, (which Westboro won,) was among the Phelps family members to use Apple products to Tweet about the death of the Apple co-founder. “Westboro will picket his funeral. He had a huge platform; gave God no glory & taught sin,” Margie tweeted Wednesday night on her iPhone. The Topeka, Kan. based church is mostly made up of Phelps family members but has risen to international infamy because of their funeral protests of celebrities and American soldiers. The church’s members believe that God punishes America for its tolerance of sin, including acceptance of homosexuality. The iPhone-wielding Westboro members seemed unable to find any irony in their embrace of the technology of a man they condemn. One church member even suggested that God was using Jobs to help advance the message of Westboro Baptist Church: “God used Steve Jobs to create amazing STUFF for WBC to preach,” wrote Shirley Phelps-Roper.

Well, that’s ironic, isn’t it? Take a busload of bat shit crazy Christians and tell them that, “y’all this Steve Jobs cat was a faggot and we’re going to protest his funeral because he’s going to hell because he made technology and oh wait…” Hey guys, next time you want to spread the world your retarded message, make sure you’re not doing it with a revolutionary device created by the man you’re saying is going to hell.   (more…)